The tale of the Englishman

I'm learning many things here in London. Academically, I am learning all about how to work with persons with amputations. How to teach them to use their artificial leg (prosthesis) to increase their mobility and in many cases, to walk again. Today, one my patients, an amputee, "graduated" from walking school and he was discharged from the hospital after being there for 3 weeks. A long time to be away from home. But at 5pm today, his son-in-law was going to pick him up and drive him home. Home again to be with his wife. And the best part: he was going to WALK into the front door. It would be the first time his wife saw him walk since he had his amputation earlier this year. What a journey this man has been on. Yes, he lost his leg. Yes, it has been painful physically and emotionally. But yes, he would walk again. He is walking again. I can just picture his wife's proud face, smiling as he walked into the house today.

And I'm learning a thing or two about the English culture. First of all, I learned the difference between British and English. The true English are those who were born and live in England. British refers to any person born and living in the United Kingdom (Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland and England).

I am adding many new words to my vocabulary such as "rubbish" "cheers" "cheeky" In context:
1. The weather today is just rubbish. There's nothing good on television. There's only rubbish
2. "Here's another cup of tea," says Sally. "Cheers," replies Andrew.
OR "Here's your change love," says the cashier. "Cheers" she replies trying to sound British but everyone knows right away, she's American.
3. "How did you get to England?" asked one my patients. "I flew." I replied. "You cheeky monkey, of course you flew!"

And last but not least, I'm learning a thing or two about romance. Yes, that's right. Yesterday, a near and dear patient of mine (a true "Englishman" he calls himself) was giving me dating advise. The conversation went something like this:

Englishman:(Insert English Accent) "Nat-a-lie, love. You really need to get married soon. It's best to get married when you're young. I can see you having a large family. Find yourself, a nice looking chap and go after him. And when you find him, give him a signal-So he knows you're interested. Give him "the look." You know, give him "the eyes." (Englishman gives me the eyes.)
Me: Ok, I'll keep that in mind then. (smiling and trying to look busy somewhere else)

10 minutes later

Englishman: Nat-a-lie, love. Come here. You see that fellow over there. He's a good looking fella. Take it from me. I know. You should go after him. Yes, he's a very good looking chap. Do you want me to say something to him? I'll tell him that you're interested.
(Insert Me with bright red cheeks)
Me: No, no. That's ok. Thank you anyway. I'd be so embarrassed.
Englishamn: Ok. Hey you, you're a handsome chap. Are you engaged??

Handsome Guy (insert thick Irish accent): No, I'm not sir. (Laughs, blushes I'm sure).
Englishman: Oh good good. Because this lady sitting right here. She's eligible. And she has eyes for you!

Me (in my head): Eyes for him. Well, he is good looking and his accent is cute, but where did this come from? Is this really happening? Did he just say this, right in front of me??

Handsome Guy: Oh, is that right? (remember: thick Irish accent = very cool).
Englishman: Yes, you should take her out to dinner. Isn't that a good idea? You'd both have a really good time.
Handsome Guy: Oh yea? I might just have to do that sir??
Englishman: Oh, brilliant. It's a date then?

Me (to Englishman): Ok, very good. I think it's that time. Your patient transport is here friend.

And Cut. Close the curtains.
Handsome Guy exits.
I exit. Beet red in the face.
Englishman goes home, only to return tomorrow.

And that is the tale of the Englishman. The tale continues of course, but that's enough for one day.

Overall, it was all in good fun.

And in case you were wondering, no there is no date in the near future.